kristin has been a bad kristin
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You need Xanax blowdarts
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize