Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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