I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize