im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
vagina is talking i cant
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
