How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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