just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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