ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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