Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
