week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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