I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
