is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I am one with the molecules
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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