Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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