You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
