You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
