So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
