That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
