Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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