Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I need water and some morals
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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