oh god the rape fog is back!
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
