looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
