My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
