I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Screwed.edu
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
