Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Also, beer. Big fan.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
