I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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