Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
