I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
