As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
