I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
