Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
