I have demons in me.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
