Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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