Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
