would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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