Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize