the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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