A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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