he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
We talked him into tasing himself.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
