It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
