Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
