YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
i think my cat just said my name.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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