Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
