I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
