Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
