I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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