It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
