I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize