That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
