I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
My balls are so social today.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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