im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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