she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
